Days 183-187 (dishin’ the details)

Fellow Wylie alum and hilarious mommy blogger, Courtney, recently left me the following comment:

“I have a blog post topic request (I'm so demanding, huh?). Sometime, I want you to blog about what you eat...your diet, etc. Also, are you still taking Alli?”

Well, Courtney, queen of the cow-dung wreaking windy city (this would be Lubbock, the Texas version of Chicago), your request is my command:

I strive* to maintain a “diet” of 1200 calories and 39 grams of fat spread throughout the day—one of the programs suggested by Alli to prevent an ass explosion. (While my fear of having said A.E. at work now prevents me from popping the fat-blocking pills, I do try* to stick to the cal/fat grams. Please note the asterisking of both “strive” and “try” … denoting of course, that I rarely succeed at either. Sigh.)

Anywhoo, on a typical day, early in the AM, about 6ish, I nosh on something to get the metabolism going, usually a serving (3/4 cup) of vanilla and almond Special K (110 calories and 1.5 grams of fat sans milk … I’m not a milk-mush on my cereal kind of girl) or a Nature Valley strawberry yogurt granola bar (140 calories and 3.5 grams of fat).

Then, 3 hours later (I eat something every three hours to fuel the fire), I snack on a serving of animal crackers or pretzels (a count of 16 is about 110 cals and 1.5 grams of fat for each) or a Wal-Mart brand (the best!) vanilla yogurt (80 cals and about 1.5 grams of fat).

Around noon I eat one of the two snacks I didn’t eat at 9 (pretzels/crackers/yogurt), along with a wrap … take one plain flour tortilla, slather on some mustard and slap on two slices of 98-percent fat free turkey—yum-o (don’t remember exact nutrition facts on this one, but it’s purty good).

At 3ish, I inhale the remaining snack. At 6 (or 7 on boot camp nights), I usually eat a large piece of baked chicken or tilapia (mama likes her “meat”) with half of a plain baked potato with salt/pepper and salad supreme (this is the BEST for adding cheesy taste with little cals) or rice or raw carrots with ranch dip (ooh, bad girl!).

After Coop’s tucked in bed and BEFORE 8 (I don’t eat after 8) I indulge in a 100-calorie snack pack of fudge stripes or lorna doone cookies or a slice of angel food cake with cool whip (you must say whip like Stewie on the Family Guy … whhhhhip).

Sprinkle in about half a dozen Diet Pepsis and two or three bottles of water with crystal light on-the-go mixed in for funzies and there you have it … a snapshot of my trough on a good* day.

You may have noticed an alarming absence of any fresh fruits or veggies (or canned/frozen/hermetically sealed fruits or veggies for that matter) in my menu. Um, yeah, I hate ‘em, so I rarely eat ‘em, but, I have been known to sneak in carrots, apples and the occasional banana. I loathe this about myself, but try as I might, I can’t keep the gag reflex from letting any of the “good stuff” go down. Perhaps I should look into hypnotherapy for help. I sure as shit don’t want Coop to be as obnoxious in his eating habits as I am.

Anywhoo, on Tuesdays and Thursdays (and now Saturday mornings starting this week) I do boot camp for an hour, which, according to one calorie-burn calculator, sweats off more than 700 calories … yippee! Two other nights (I take two nights off) I walk on the treadmill or hit the park and do some of the strength training exercises from BC.

If I were able to stick to this plan for more than a few days at a time, I’m sure the weight would be melting off. But, I’m weak and a weiner, so I deal with the set backs and keep pushing forward.

Hope this helps! If you have ANY tips, please dish!!!